Monday, January 26, 2009

Jay's Cafe Uses the Term Cafe Lightly

NOW CLOSED - wamp, wamp

Jay's Cafe
791 Raymond Avenue
St. Paul, MN 55114

Wow, so what can I say about Jay's? Nothing good, that's for sure. Everything about this experience was awful. I would never and will never recommend this place to anyone. The biggest disappointment for me was the fact that I had really high hopes for this place. I even brought my camera to document this time.

This cafe way trying really hard to be cute and trendy. I was sort of feeling it at first (or at least trying to), but then the waitress came out and it was the beginning of the end. All I have to say is - if you're the only waitress in a small place like Jay's you should know how to do your job better. I've seen waitresses with twenty tables in a packed sports bar give better service than this fruity pie did. And I'd like to note, that before my cushy office job found me, I was waiting tables so I know what I'm talking about. That and I was damned good at my job...toot, toot.

The waitress proceeded to check our IDs for the mimosas we had ordered and as I fumbled through my huge purse (as I usually do) she said I could just tell her if I was 21 or not. I'm not sure if it was because she was getting annoyed with me having a hard time finding my ID or if she really just didn't give a fuck. I don't look old enough to not have my ID checked. And I had to suffer through official training to learn how to check ID (for a bartending job) so take it seriously. She followed that with "it's not like you're going to get wasted or anything". Um...what if we were? A little hint: don't use the word wasted unless talking to your friends, definitely don't say that to customers.

So...after that wonderful welcome she returned with our mimosas. They had adorable little strawberry garnishes! How CUTE! Except mine was moldy. We placed our orders and went on with it. It took a long time considering what we ordered and what ended up on our table. All the food was cold (of course it took so long, you had to let it get to room temp, thanks!), bland, and not worth the price. Actually, I take that back, Mr. B had a decent breakfast, but given the rest of our experience we will not be returning.

Bottomless mimosas $5.00 - great, right? In order for any booze drink or beer to be bottomless at Jay's you can't look like you weigh 90 pounds. Otherwise the waitress will cut you off when she sees fit. I guess I was a 90 pounder, because I had only 2 before she stopped coming back to our table to check on us...guess 2 was the limit.

Biscuits & Gravy Special $TOO MUCH (mine...barf)
There was only one biscuit to speak of, it was cut in half, the bottom was burnt, the whole thing was cold, the gravy was sweet and floury and cold, the pork was dry and had too much sage in it...what else...oh yeah, the eggs made me not want to eat eggs for awhile. Cold, rubbery, dry. The best thing on this plate was the pineapple garnish...AND I DON'T EVEN LIKE PINEAPPLE!

The picture does it more justice than it deserves.

Cheese & Herb Omlet $$$WAY TOO MUCH (For the Sister)
Once again, it was cold. There were no herbs...I guess my sister found a chive and a piece of parsley, but that was it. There was a small amount of brie inside, but it had already began to harded up again because it was sitting around in the cold for so long. My sister agreed that she wasn't going to be able to eat eggs for awhile after that experience. The breakfast potatoes were decent, but also cold.

Breakfast Pastry $NOT WORTH IT (Mr. B's)
The only thing that was warm. The inside was filled with red bell peppers, melted cheese, and some sort of meat. The outside was golden brown and flakey. Served with seasoned breakfast potatoes and a couple pieces of fruit. Mr. B approved, but it didn't save the breakfast.

# of People: 4
Reservations: Had none, didn't need to, no one was there.
Day/Time of Visit: Sunday, January 25th - 8:00am
Will I be back: Only if they close and someone else moves there.
YAYs!: My review of Jay's proves that I'm not a softy. Everything else was horrible.
Nays: See all reasons above. Bad service, bad food, bad restaurant.
Notes: If you're in that neck of the woods go next door to Keys.

- an angry B.W.

In Jay's defense some people do like it (says Urbanspoon)
Jay's Cafe on Urbanspoon

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